Okay so this is assignment 3 for the previously mentioned competition I'm in!
Basically for this assignment we had to find an idiom, and base the plot around it!
The idiom I chose is: "A picture paints a thousand words"
This is similar to "Actions speak louder than words" because it's saying that what is shown in a picture (for example) can say more about you than the description of you in words.
*confusing time over*
Here is the entry!~
"JENNA!" My niece, Rhona, squealed with delight at the sight of me. Despite her small limbs, she ran with such energy towards me that I was nearly bowled over when she leaped into my arms and planted a kiss on my nose.
"Hey there, stranger! My, my! You've grown so much since Christmas, haven't you?" I giggled as her gold curls bounced in a few nods of her little head. She looked at me with her big brown eyes and nudged me in the direction of the kitchen. Walking in, my boots noisily left an echo as they stomped over the ivory tiles. Hanging in the air, there was the delicious aroma of sugary sweet homemade cupcakes; Lisa's famous decorated cakes which she sold in her bakery beneath the apartment she lived in with her husband and Rhona.
My sister (Lisa) peaked her head around the doorway of her pantry and smiled widely to me. She stepped out swiftly, setting down boxes of cupcakes and brownies on the counter top as she made her way towards me. At the last minute she threw her flour-coated apron on her chair and hugged me (and Rhona, as she had not yet let go of me) as tightly as she could.
"Jenna! Thank you so much for coming! You are literally the best sister in the world -heck, you're a lifesaver!"
She squeezed me, and I watched as a few strands of auburn hair fell out of her already loose bun.
"What are sisters for, Lee-Lee? Anyways, it's always great to see you, Dave and Ro!"
Rhona squirmed in my arms as us adults talked about her bedtime, lunchtime and also my sleeping arrangements. I was babysitting Rhona for the entire weekend, so Lisa and Dave could enjoy a few well-earned romantic evenings together. As Rhona jumped down, I could finally turn my attention to distracting her so Lisa could get ready.
"Well then, Ro! While Mommy gets ready for her date with Daddy, let's decide everything you want to do!"
As I was distracting her, Lisa mouthed her thanks and sneaked upstairs to jump in the shower and try a few outfits on. Eyes glinting with excitement, Rhona repeated; "Everything..?" before listing an extravagant series of games and TV shows she did NOT want to miss.
*******
Over the rest of the evening, fun antics ensued. Rhona and I enjoyed a most delightful tea party with "Mr Fluffles" and "Madam Pink"; also known as her toy bunny and pink stuffed animal. Lisa managed to slip away in the midst of it all, joining David in the car outside. She looked stunning in a violet cocktail dress, the perfect companion to Dave and his dashing suit. I managed to get Rhona to sleep at around 8pm, after I read a section of Horrid Henry to her. It was quite peaceful after that, so I sat down with a cup of tea and a chocolate cupcake to watch the evening news.
Nothing extremely interesting caught my eye, and so I found myself conflicted between wanting to eat the cupcake and not wanting to destroy it's prettiness. It was complete with sugary décor and everything! In any case, I half-heartedly bit into the cupcake and threw all worries if ruining it to the wind.
"Damn, this is delicious!" I thought to myself, as the anchor man introduced the latest, most scandalous celebrity news. Right about then my perfectly happy day came crashing down.
Images flashed up of an ex-Disney Channel actress; Nicola Hart. Except, she wasn't sweet-faced and kind-looking like she was famed for.
Her once chocolate-brown coloured hair was now messy, blue and -disgustingly- had vomit clinging to the strands. She was flipping off the paparazzi, showing an engagement ring (looks like somebody got a bit too drunk in Vegas) and newly-created tattoos. There were five more photos of her sticking her tongue down five different boys' throats, and another of her drinking and taking pills (assumed to be ecstasy pills). The presenter explained she was now facing court and her reality TV show: Heart to Hart was being axed.
In disbelief, I dropped the cupcake in my lap and barely heard the keys jingling in the door. Lisa and Dave stumbled in, with news of their great date. Lisa noticed where I was staring though, and soon became enthralled in the scandalous Nicola story.
"Wait, isn't she that girl you used to play with when we were little?" Lisa inquired.
Yes, Nicola was, but I wasn't so sure who my old best friend was anymore. Because of this I replied;
"Um, I don't think so. I can't say I recognise this girl. Not at all..."
After the news had finished, I listened eagerly to see how their date had went. They had visited Los Angeles for a glamorous night out (as they were up to their necks in money) and had met up with Lisa's friends Joanne and Matthew. Apparently it had all gone well, and they spent the evening in the Venice bar enjoying a meal and watching the nightlife the restaurant offered. I excused myself soon later to go to my bedroom, I had a brief thought of what I wanted to do tomorrow; fix Nicola Hart's life.
*********
The next day, I woke up early so I could drive to L.A. before it was time to look after Ro again. Sandhaven wasn't too far from Los Angeles; where Nicola lived. I knew her address from various news articles over the years, so all that was left to do was arrive, buy a magazine and figure out what the hell I was going to say.
I payed for a copy of OK! magazine, with Nicola on the front (naturally) and then hopped straight back into my little Mini Cooper to track down her and her palace of sorts. At long last, I drove all the way up to her doorstep, threatening to run over paparazzi if they didn't get out of my way. I had an appointment, so getting through the gates was no problem at all; just a minor wait which I couldn't avoid.
Without paying attention to her mansion or the splendour inside, I "checked in" with her manager; Claire. She didn't seem too happy to let me into the house, but she agreed someone needed to talk to Nicola, and that someone was going to have to be me. I marched straight up to her room and at first she appeared to be sprawled across her bed asleep. Nevertheless she jumped to life when she saw me.
"Oh my God! Jenna Atkinson! Is it really you?"
Her voice was filled with excitement which was probably as fake as her boobs. She squealed and hugged me, expecting me to hug her back. She smelled strongly of alcohol and smoke, so I moved away from her as soon as I could.
"Yes, it's me. But don't think I'm excited to see you. In fact, I'm not even sure I know you right now."
Her face twisted, and made her look like a toddler who was about to throw a massive tantrum, although she stayed silent.
"Have you even SEEN yourself in this?" I thrust the magazine in her face and watched her mean grey eyes scan over the images and, briefly, the text. By the end, she shrugged.
"So what? I had fun, something you might want to try!"
I shook off her petty insult easily. I was so angry I could barely see straight.
"Who do you think you are? A superstar, maybe? I don't think so. What I see before me is someone who thinks they're God's gift, and can do whatever they want just because they are famous."
Although I was still seething, I calmed down, relieved that I vented some of my feelings.
All our best memories were coming back to me. They seemed so happy, and radiated a warm glow as if they all happened in a perfect sunset. I remembered having tea parties much like mine and Ro's with a pretty young girl who was the nicest and best person you could ever wish to meet. But then we both grew up. She left to act professionally, and I lived a normal, simple yet perfect life in every way.
The girl in the room before me was not my best friend, and probably could never find herself again.
"I can't help that I'm popular, Jenna."
"You know who else was popular? My best friend. Have you seen her lately? We haven't spoken in about 8 years, and I think I've lost her now."
For once, her pale face showed emotion; sadness.
"I'm your best friend, remember?" She whispered softly.
I was hoping right now I could say the perfect thing to finally make her realise she couldn't carry on this way. I wanted her to realise who she really could be; my best friend again.
"Look, as long as you are Nicola Hart The Celebrity, you aren't my best friend forever. Call me when Nicki shows up, that's who my BFF is."
By using my old nickname for her, I think I was getting to her, helping her; making her understand.
"You can't just renounce fame!"
"It's now or never," I thought to myself.
"But you can renounce being a whore, drugs alcohol and even cigarettes if you put your mind to it. Please save your breath. No matter what you say, a picture paints a thousand words. Get help and tell me when you find Nicki, because you aren't Nicki right now. Maybe I'll listen when you are."
Finishing my speech, I flushed red, feeling awkward. I grabbed my bag and rummaged around for my keys, and walked out of her room so I could walk back into my perfect life with Lisa, Rhona and Dave.
Bambi!~
MY SCOREING
ReplyDeleteSpelling: 9/10
Grammar: 9/10
Creativity: 9/10
Sticking to assignment: 5/5
How long it keeps you hooked: 9/10
How much the judge likes it: 5/5
Overall: 47/50
Comment:Only a few tense issues e.g. Spoke instead of spoken etc and anchor man is two separate words. And there is an incorrect use of a semi colon..well..it's semi incorrect lol.(My niece; Rhona, squealed with delight at the sight of me) You could probably just ditch it completely) Other than that, I quite liked it. The flow between the ***'s is kind of jumpy, but there isn't much you can do about that. Also, the hooking bits kind of trail on and off but that is certainly fixed well by the end. :) Sorry if that was too critical!
NOW FOR THE REAL SCORES!
MICROSOFT WORD'S SCORING XD
Spelling: 9/10 Microsoft word does not approve of the name Rhona!
Grammar: 7/10 WAYY TOO MANY GREEN WIGGLES! XD
Creativity: Microsoft Anna just asked me to check a box..../10
Sticking to assignment: CHECK BOX/5
How long it keeps you hooked: ERROR /10
How much the judge likes it:DO YOU WISH TO EXIT NARRATOR? /5
Overall: DOES NOT COMPUTE/50
Comment: ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO NARRATOR? YES/NO
:P Good luck Bambi! I'm sure you'll do fine! ♥